Bon Voyage

Last week a Frenchman set "sail" from a Canary Island hoping to float with the wind and current and arrive in a Caribbean Island. Except he is attempting this voyage in a barrel-like capsule. He said he would like to end up on a French Island as "the paper work would be easier." Amen to that! When the schooner TIKI put into Fort du France, Martinique the tri-color was flying from the flagpole and the Customs Inspector wearing his kepi was all business, checking our passports and our passenger manifest (10 passengers). He doubled as the Port Manager and could make your life easy or otherwise. In the long ago, we had to submit our cargo manifest to the local French Consul before sailing to get stamped and approved. After twenty years consulate duty in China he was pleased to be in Philadelphia but we always sent an escort with our secretary as the old boy had an eye for the ladies.
tjs

Of Sound Mind.

Because of all the fraud and corruption in the real estate business in Moscow (Russia that is) anyone wishing to sell their apartment or dwelling must provide a "certificate of sanity" to complete closing. It is usually a twenty minute session with a psychologist to prove that you are of sound mind and rational. Buyers are also not immune as their money in escrow often gets frozen or manipulated. Which brings us to the phantom Trump Tower which if ever built will be a field day for the criminals perpetrating such fraud and one more headache for the fellow temporarily in residence at the White House.
tjs
(NYT 12/26/18)

Happiness

With the Dow tanking it is difficult to find a ray of happiness at this Christmas time. But the United Nations poll of 156 nations reveals that Finland was named the most happiest country. Of course this is after the Trump/Putin famous meeting in July in Helsinki where the natives are "happy" it is over. In 1957 Peggy Lee did a song called "Happiness is just a thing called Joe." But the lyric brought forth tears rather than smiles. But for a current chuckle consider the new chief of staff, Mick Mulvaney, commenting on the government stoppage "The ball's in the Dems corner." Every hoops fan knows you get trapped in the corner. He meant to say "The ball's in the Dems court." But then Mick is new in his job.
tjs

A Fair Shake

Dateline: Copenhagen Denmark - the government passed a law that all new citizens must shake hands at the naturalization ceremony. This recalled the time I and my colleagues were entertaining customers at Johnny Lattner's  restaurant in Chicago - a  large amphitheater type room. A group that called themselves The Turtle Society was having their meeting there and admitting new members. Their motto was that the Turtle was a clean minded amphibian and the first question asked of these applicants was "What does a man do standing up, that a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?" If you didn't answer "Shaking hands" then you wouldn't be swimming with turtles. I must confess that our entire table failed the test. Good luck, Denmark.
tjs

Who's on First?

Abbott & Costello were talking about first base. The current occupant of the White House was born on third base and thinks he hit a triple as the comic says. But who comprise his "base"? Is it the disillusioned evangelicals? Coupled with the sheetless torchbearers? And the NRA gang infiltrated by Russia? Plus some regular folks who drank his Kool Ade. Pity these latter when they review their year end 401K statements. They are all being "debased!" His trade wars and inopportune tariffs have roiled the markets and a lot of good citizens are being hurt. Hopefully, as some of them regain their 20-20 view then he can forget 2020!
Robert Mueller - please hasten your report!
tjs

A War of Words

Re: The word of the year 2018. We had been "informed" by Dictionary.com that their word of the year was "misinformation". Now comes Oxford Dictionaries with "toxic" as its word. And sure enough, Merriam Webster chimes in with "justice" as in "obstruction of". So, even the dictionaries are quarreling and it being the Christmas Season one doesn't wish to hear "a discouraging word".
tjs

I Love a Piano

Cole Porter's piano, which sat in the lobby of the Waldorf Astoria Hotel after his death, is now being restored at the Steinway factory in Astoria, Queens. The man who presides over this procedure has 45 years with Steinway and his grandfather who was blind was a tuner there. Sound your A! The Waldorf is also having a face lift scheduled to reopen in 2021 primarily as condos. Porter did most of his work at night and had installed "acoustical mud" to deaden the sound of his piano in deference to his neighbors who included Herbert Hoover in the 1930s.
tjs

A Generational Thing

The NYT magazine writes that polls taken in the U.S. & U.K. indicate that 40% of adults sleep holding stuffed animals. Many admit even talking to them. Now we know what 2016 taught us about polls and I don't doubt that Brexit has made the Brits clutch anything warm & fuzzy. But I was a child of the great Depression and this practice passed me by. The Teddy Bear goes back to 1902 from a Roosevelt hunting trip but apparently is now out of favor. As an outlier I wonder what I will find under the Christmas tree.
tjs

A Tale of Two Cities

Tony Bennett sang "I left my heart in San Francisco..." but this heart left Sacramento destined Seattle on Southwest Airlines as "cargo" but they failed to deliver it to the waiting courier and the plane took off for Dallas. Ninety minutes later the plane turned around and arrived back within the time limits allowed i.e. "a heartbeat away". A medical doctor delayed by this exercise was quoted "Heart transplants aren't something you throw in a Walmart cooler and put on a plane. After apologies all around passengers were delayed five hours. (Note the heart in Southwest logo)
tjs

Do the Math

My landlord has advised an increase next year of $33. per month. But SSA has declared a COLA and I will be netting $64. per month. So I am keeping one step ahead of the landlord. I figure that there are at least four millenials out there supporting my habit. Seems unfair - but life is good.
tjs

Quote of the Week

Last week, prior to my Tariff Man rant, and with the Dow Jones sinking into the December darkness, I was yearning for some humor "tell me a joke, please!" We had just buried Bush 41 and that old cowhand Alan Simpson was doing a eulogy about the deceased sense of humor. "He never lost his sense of humor.......humor is the universal solvent against the abrasive elements of life." Wow! If that Priest, Rabbi and Minister walk into a bar they better not come out until they can tell us a joke.
tjs
(Above subject of Bret Stephens NYT oped 12/8/18)

Crossed Strings

Our music at Mass includes a marvelous violinist. Which brings to mind the following about the famous Fritz Kreisler who met a society matron who asked him to play for her ladies' garden club.
The date was open and he said my fee is one thousand dollars. The lady didn't blink but countered with conditions. She said "please be on time, use the servants' entrance and don't mingle with my guests." He replied "Madam, inasmuch as I will not be required to fraternize with your guests, then my fee will only be $500."
tjs

Tariff Man

With the Dow in the toilet and our 401Ks decimated, it brings one to scream for relief. Hence, let me vent:
-Promises made - a War on Trade - but China delayed - and with Kim he's played - loved Macron's parade - passed on Putin's raid - Saudi Prince evade - hand overplayed - get's an "F" grade - I feel betrayed - may his twittering fade - only one term I prayed. Amen.
tjs

Supply & Demand

Eighty-five years ago this week Prohibition was abolished after fourteen years of thirst. As eager imbibers rushed to the streets they found a shortage of product - bathtub gin was no longer acceptable. But the bootleggers and speakeasys saved the day and alcohol was flowing again. On the subject of bootleggers I had read that it was they in their souped up limousines escaping police chases that was the genesis of what is now NASCAR. Vroooom!
tjs

On the Hoof

We have all heard of banks that are too big to fail.
Now we have "herd" of an Australian steer that is too big to filet. Knickers is 6 foot 4 inches tall and don't let him near your china shop. Of course his name has different connotations in the British Empire. The fellow seems content roaming with his shorter cousins and apparently is safe from the slaughterhouse as he doesn't fit in the necessary farm equipment. So have a g'day, matey!
tjs

Quotes of the Week

"No good deed goes unpunished" - Harold O. Levy (dec).

Character is Destiny! - Greek Philosopher Heraclitus & Sen. John McCain.

"Read my lips - no new taxes! - Geo. H.W. Bush (Dec. 11/30/18) 

The truth never wavers. = NYTimes

Divisiveness sells - comity doesn't. - James Baker
tjs