Tag Team

When I worked in Manhattan in the 1970s the New York Athletic Club was a prestigious private men's club on Central Park South populated primarily by the well-off New York Irish. They were famous for their track meets at Madison Square Garden - but I didn't know they were into wrestling too. (But Google says they are) Last Tuesday around midnight there was a 911 call from their address. When police arrived they found several males tussling in the bar. Jackets are required in the club and it appeared that it was Armani versus Bill Blass as they laid hands on each other and a few punches were thrown. I just learned that the club was forced to go coed and it was surmised that the altercation may have involved a woman - and was perhaps imbued with the spirit of Hiram Walker.
tjs
Next -Litiginous Lawyers

Dick Cavett

I always look forward to Dick Cavett's occasional columns in the NYTimes - usually on a Saturday. He is a witty fellow with a great interviewing style. He often reminisces about his idol Groucho Marx.  Groucho was of the old school of comics - having honed his sthick in vaudeville and then on to Hollywood, radio and television. He had a bent kneed gait, wore a swallow tail coat, sported a fake mustache and smoked an ever present cigar. Just as he was fading from the scene he was rediscovered by the college set who hung on his every word. Besides his quick wit Groucho could play piano and also acted in Gilbert & Sullivan light opera. While in Hollywood he and his family were invited to a country club by an unthinking member to use the pool. Many country clubs were "restricted" in those days and his daughter was denied use of the pool. Groucho said " She's only half Jewish, can she go in up to her waist.?" The Marx brothers with their zaniness gave us great pleasure growing up. They also drove the script writers such as George S. Kaufmann wild with their antics. Groucho's last interview with Cavett is on U Tube and worth seeing. But as Groucho was fond of saying "I really must be going"
tjs
Next - TBA

Pistol Packin

NYT front page Tues. April 24th byline by Matt Richtel - "New Fashion Wrinkle". Certain clothing manufacturers are now designing to attract the concealed gun owner.  Chino pants with a second pocket behind the traditional front pocket for a weapon. If you prefer to pack your gun in a holster it can be tucked inside the stretchable waistband. All this for the fashion aware gun owner. There are shirts with side slits with Velcro for easily removal of hardware. There is also a water- resistant vest coming out that "includes a stealth compartment in front so the wearer can appear to be warming his hands while actually gripping a pistol in a waistband holster." Surprise! Next comes a jacket with a channel cut thru the back that can be used to store plastic handcuffs - so says the manufacturer. All this fashion to eliminate the unsightly bulges. It may remind old timers of that Mae West risque quip  "Are ya packin a rod or are you just glad to see me?" Ooops.
tjs
Next - Dick Cavett

For the Birds

During my twenty years in Florida we had a bird bath in the rear garden frequented by blue jays, sparrows and a few cardinals - we also fed them. But in New York you can get fined for having a similar bird bath in your yard. The Health Authorities are worried about West Nile virus introduced by mosquitoes. They are debating the difference between "stagnant" water and "standing" water. So the fine can run $300. and the birds go thirsty. Expect to hear from the Audubon Society on this one.
tjs
Next - Pistol Packin

Grenadines II

As a salute to the late Teddy Charles I am repeating my posting of 2/23/11 -

http://teejaysmith.blogspot.com/2011/02/grenadines.html?spref=fb

Jazz Plus

Last Saturday's NYTimes obituary page ran a feature on one "Teddy Charles , 84, Jazz Musician turned sea captain." When I still worked in Philadelphia in the 1970s I joined a sailing club working out of City Island in the Bronx run by Teddy Charles who had a schooner berthed there and took club members out on Long Island Sound for a week-end sail. The wind dictated whether we headed north to Connecticut for lobsters or to Greenport or Shelter Island in New York waters. One sunny Sunday afternoon while motoring back to base he suddenly cut the engines and we drifted right out in the middle of the Sound. Teddy then inflated six innertubes and threw them in the water followed by sunburned sailors and we had a water ballet going that would have impressed Billy Rose. Teddy had a U.S. Coast Guard license and taught me all about sailing. He was quite a character - his New York patois and bald head resembled Phil Silvers (Sgt. Bilko). We knew he was a musician but had no idea of his achievements as listed in the obit. He once told us of sitting in with Benny Goodman at the Paramount theater one New Year's Eve and said "the joint was jumpin". I sailed with him up the Hudson and down in the West Indies where he ran the 90 foot schooner TIKI among the islands. With passengers scarce he decided to carry cargo inter-island and won a contract (handshake) to carry rum
which denoted reliability and respectability. He knew I worked in the shipping industry so one day called me to ask "How much should I charge?" He was planning to sell the TIKI so I joined him in Antigua for the final voyage - he had his youthful crew stowing the cases of rum in the staterooms which the American Bureau of Shipping would frown on. So sailing down to Montserrat and Martinique we could hear the cargo creaking in the "hold". He had lumber lashed on deck and we felt like a genuine "rum runner." I bade farewell to him in Martinique as he was preparing to turn the boat over to the prospective new owner.
During the Bicentennial Celebration on July 4, 1976 Ted Charles had three boats in the spectator parade. The boats were being hosted by the yacht clubs on the Sound and I joined the MARY E  at Mamaroneck Y.C. and on Saturday we sailed down the East River single file and anchored just north of the Verrazano Narrows Bridge to await the Tall Ships on Sunday which was the greatest sight on water for this landlubber. Perhaps they can use a Coast Guard certified vibraphonist in Heaven.
tjs
Next - The Grenadines

New Year's Eve

Many of the tributes to Dick Clark included his longevity as host to festivities on New Year's Eve in New York City with the countdown to midnight, etc.  My earlier memory is of one of his predecessors  - old timers will recall Ben Grauer - a dapper and erudite gentleman - wearing a black homburg hat, a black overcoat and white scarf - atop the Times building in the 1970s. He had been a child actor on the stage, later went into radio and was never lost for words. He carried the program alone, unlike the pairings we are offered today. (Please pass the remote.) This was the era when Guy Lombardo ushered in the New Year at the Roosevelt Grill. Bing Crosby (White Christmas) and Guy Lombardo (Auld lang syne) both died in late 1977 - less than one month apart. At the time I wrote to my future wife that "they have snuffed out Christmas and New Year's with one fell swoop."
tjs
Next -TBA

Bandstand

Dick Clark who passed away yesterday at age 82 started his American Bandstand show in West Philadelphia at the old WFIL-TV studio. This location was within walking distance of several local high schools so he didn't want for an audience. The kids who made it in would eventually hit the dance floor and most probably be on camera for their fifteen minutes of fame. However, the Catholic high school girls all wore uniforms with their school insignias sewn thereon and they were forbidden by the nuns from attending this gathering. Of course, a few "brazen" individuals would hike up their hemlines a few inches and brave the consequences. But this was circa 1955 during the vanilla Eisenhower years and youth was not defiant back then.  Life wasn't always fair then either. R.I.P. Dick Clark, born three weeks after yours truly, you will be missed on New Year's Eve.
tjs
Next - TBA

Subway straphangers

When I worked in Lower Manhattan I often took the Lexington Ave. subway between Grand Central and Bowling Green. The following story is apocryphal but amusing - if you have ever ridden any subways.
This fellow lived in an apartment building on the east side of New York City.His lighting was provided by six foot long fluorescent bulbs. When one burned out he sought out the super for disposal. The super said he could not place it in the normal trash receptacle. What to do? He remembered that there was a dumpster downtown near his office so the next morning he entered the subway with briefcase and bulb in hand and since it was crowded he was forced to stand holding his six foot "pole" erect. (see photo) Soon more commuters entered the car and several began to hold onto his "pole". When his stop arrived he calmly let go and stepped off the train.
tjs
Next - TBA

Save the Brand

The Ford Motor Company has just announced a reduction in sales of their top-of-the-line Lincoln and have hired a designer away from Cadillac to reverse the trend and keep the brand from extinction. Lincoln has been under pressure before when certain quarters advocated the elimination of the one cent coin - the Lincoln penny. And Abe himself didn't fare too well at a certain FORD'S theater, either. Let's hope no one attacks Mt. Rushmore.
tjs
Next - Subway Straphangers

Green Pigs

The following datelined Canada 4/4/12 ver batim: A Canadian project aimed at creating a genetically engineered pig whose manure would be less harmful to the environment is being halted after failing to find a company willing to bring the animal to market. The less polluting pig, called the "enviropig" has a gene that allows it to better digest phosphorous in its food, therefore reducing the amount of phosphorous in the manure. The genetically altered pig was created using genetic material from a mouse.??? But farmers can now give pigs a supplement in their food to achieve the same end. unquote. NYT 4/4/12.
So hog bellies may be down in Chicago but the manure is pure in Canada. (Slow news day)
tjs
Next - Protect the Brand

R.M.S. TITANIC

This Sunday, April 15th will mark the one hundredth anniversary of the sinking of this majestic liner with the loss of life of over 1500 souls. This week you will hear and read much about this tragedy which occurred on her maiden voyage from Southampton, England to New York. She was built in Belfast, North Ireland and there is a museum there commemorating the occasion. If you cannot get to Belfast try to see the exposition at South Street Seaport in New York.
Having worked for thirty-seven years with United States Lines I was always fascinated with the comparison to our own S.S. UNITED STATES which sailed on her trans-atlantic maiden voyage in 1952 - forty years after the TITANIC embarked. One of our old hands in the London office felt there was a similarity between the two vessels - except in their fates. Both vessels sought to break the trans-atlantic speed record. Both had their naval architects on board. Both had owner's family members on board. But the TITANIC, the pride of the White Star Line -  struck an iceberg and never made it to New York. We might consider another co-incidence - at the time of the S.S. UNITED STATES crossing in 1952 our company president was Gen. John M. Franklin. When the TITANIC embarked on her fateful voyage in 1912 the General's father P.A.S. Franklin was an executive in the White Star Line's New York office. I often wondered how he handled the hordes of people who descended upon lower Manhattan that week in April 1912 and thereafter. The predecessor of U.S. Lines shared office space with the White Star Line in the London City office and our "old hand" assisted handling claims into the 1930s. He later said that many claims in that era were from various types seeking salvage rights.
tjs
Next -A Matter of Taste II

Rolling Heads

The General Services Administration (G.S.A.) was a little known government agency responsible for purchasing big ticket items i.e. buying and leasing cars and buildings. In October 2010 they held a conference at a Las Vegas Spa and Casino for 300 attendees to the tune of $822,000 of taxpayers funds. Besides a lavish menu there were commemorative coin sets, a clown and a mind reader. The clown was an entertainer not the person who arranged the party. As the NYT writer asked "If they had a clairvoyant how come nobody saw the backlash coming?" Old Vegas hands wished that what happened there would have stayed there. Meanwhile, mind readers were finding themselves in hot demand. With several congressional committees planning investigations, two top deputies bit the dust and the top official resigned. (Per NYTimes National 4/4/12)
tjs
Next -TBA

Good Friday

In deference to Holy Week we will dispense with Friday Funnies and meditate instead on Christ's Passion and Death and then wish all a Happy Easter. We will be out of pocket over Easter - resuming blog next week - mid week.
tjs
Next - TBA

Pop Goes......

As if we haven't had enough TV shows about mobsters (i.e. Sopranos, Goodfellas, etc) we now see that women are getting a piece of the action. (NYT 3/29/12 Styles) "Mob Wives" now in its second season. There was a time when the families kept their women out of the limelight. Reading this it brought back a time fifty plus years ago when a female member of my extended family had a brush with a real life mobster. She was eighteen and had just graduated high school when a classmate invited her to a week-end in Miami Beach chaperoned by the classmates parents. At a dinner party at a swank Miami hotel the young ladies were introduced to one Jimmy Frattiano (now deceased). In his line of work he was known as "Jimmy the Weasel" having boxed in the ring as Kid Weasel. The girls later said "he offered them funny looking cigarettes." He was not an imposing figure and having just spent 6-1/2 years in jail presume his prison pallor was in need of some Florida sunshine. But his resume in Wikipedia is as long as your arm and  will curl your hair. He was the real deal - and eventually cooperated with the Feds and went into the witness protection program, then came out, and wrote several books and died in his own time while some of his victims did not have that luxury. Oh, and the girls swear that they discarded the cigarettes.
tjs
Next - Good Friday

Uneasy lies the crown

Jon S. Corzine is in the public eye again in connection with the bankruptcy of his MF Global hedge fund. In his earlier career he was CEO at Goldman Sachs, and Senator from and Governor of the State of New Jersey. The last time he was in the headlines he was speeding up the Garden State Parkway without a safety belt - he the top executive of the state. His appearances before congressional committees have treated him deferentially as a past member of their august body. But he may have more appearances in his future trying to explain the missing customer funds. The only reason I mention him today is that I came across a quotation from him when he was running for the Senate from New Jersey - (the New York Times treated it as the quotation of the day) Quote "I shouldn't have said what I am reported to have said. And if I did, I apologized."unquote. With that kind of perfect syntax and grammar I'm sure he will dazzle the next committee interrogators.
tjs
Next - Pop Goes.....

Cornucopia

It may be time for a Rooney Ramble. What is this obsession with vegetables? Last week Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia posited that "if the Federal Government could force you to obtain health insurance then they could also force you to eat broccoli." I happen to like broccoli, but not every day. George H.W. Bush hates broccoli so I dare the Feds. force-feeding old number 41 against his will. All this recalls memories of mother urging Johnny to eat his spinach - or else.  Or perhaps making a strong argument for carrots improving your eyesight. I have several friends who are vegans but they do it by choice. Sometimes persuasion works best as the vision of a cow suggesting we eat more "chikin".
While all eyes and ears were on the Supreme Court you may have missed the following datelined Brussels - "The European Union has fined certain freight forwarders for price fixing in international trade." The clever cartels were using "gardening" terms as code words for their activity i.e. the names of vegetables with heavy emphasis on asparagus. (see NYT 3/29/12) Now I also like asparagus even though it gives the urine a sweet aroma. So pass the peas and mashed potatoes but hold back the rutabagas -and please no brussels sprouts - they give me too much gas.
tjs
PS - I seem to recall that Dan Quayle had his own problem with vegetables - he couldn't spell them.
Next - Uneasy lies the crown.

Big Game Hunter

I first met Henry S. in the late 1950s when I was in the steamship business in Philadelphia. "Hank's" business was supplying shackles and wire rope to the ships. But his avocation was as a big game hunter. He and his wife would make periodic trips to east Africa - what is now Kenya and Tanzania. This was a time when the Mau Mau was active in that area and one had to be careful traveling on safari. Eventually he hung up the guns on the rack and concentrated on filming these animals. His home movies were riveting. In one scene a bull elephant charged the camera - Hank's wife was doing the filming - she held the frame for a two second count  - then blackout - as they all scrambled into the Range Rover. He became an advocate of the wildlife and supporter of the local Zoological Garden. Much later when I had transferred to New York I received an invitation to a cocktail party and reception to be hosted by Hank at the local Philadelphia Zoo. I remember taking the train down to Philadelphia and directing the taxi driver to "take me to the Zoo." The reception was a flowing one away from the screeching monkey house and as free of odors as one might find - and all for charity - and a support of the local Zoo. In an earlier life my friend played football at the University of Virginia and prided himself as having done the blocking for the great Bullet Bill Dudley of NFL fame.
tjs
Next - Cornucopia