DEE DAY

The Googler has just reminded me that today I am "posting" number 500 - which in Super Bowl Speak would rate a "D" - although I was hoping for at least a B Plus.  At this milestone I will now place "BLOG" in idle status over the holidays and attempt to resume after the New Year. I hope I have provided a few smiles or chuckles or perhaps an occasional blast from the past along the way to make your day brighter. And I appreciate your loyal readership - all writers appreciate feedback. Here's wishing you and yours a Happy Christmas and let's remember all our friends and neighbors who are still suffering along the Jersey Coast. See you in January. And a Happy New Year!
tjs
Next - 2013

Spell Check

A few years ago, before I had a SPAM filter in place, I began receiving a spate of  Emails  - believed from Canada - promoting penile enhancement. They promised no weights or other indignities in their program. Their tease referred to "size" and preyed on ones self esteem, manhood and peer pressure. Then one day a message arrived  referring to PENAL enhancement! These S.O.B.s were PENALIZING me for perceived anatomical shortcomings. If they couldn't spell it they shouldn't sell it! Soon  I had my SPAM filter in place and no more intrusions from north of the border. And at age 83 who needs them when both Cialis and Viagra are vying for the business.
tjs
Next - DEE DAY

Silent Night

"Silent Night" the Christmas carol was first performed in 1818 in a church in Austria. The melody was written by a local village organist to guitar accompaniment. Legend has it that the organ was broken and song was performed only with guitar. Which brings me to the current - Charlie Byrd's CD of eighteen Christmas songs on solo guitar with no accompaniment - just pure Byrd recorded in 1980.
I met the man around that time on a rustic beach in Dewey Beach, Delaware where he was sitting on a cottage porch strumming away wearing a three day beard. His handshake was very soft similar to a surgeon's. Around that time he and his wife were active playing around Annapolis, Maryland and the Washington D.C. area. A nice rendition.
tjs
Next - Spell Check

Sequestration

Sequestration is a fancy name for austerity thrust upon the tax payers known as the "fiscal cliff". This is not going off the cliff the way Thelma & Louise did in their blue convertible. This cliff would mean cutbacks across the board - and lots of government jobs lost. Department of Homeland Security alone could begin eliminating about 24,500 jobs - 11% of work force. The Transportation Security Administration who screen us at the airport could have to cut 7,240 security officers lengthening screening lines. The acronym for T.S.A. is "Thousands Standing Around" so maybe such possible cuts might not slow down the lines after all.  On a personal note I have switched from shoelaces to velcro.
tjs (Above data from NYT 12/11/12 by Ron Nixon)
Next -Silent Night

Punny or Funny IX

A dentist and a manicurist married - they fought tooth and nail.

A will is a ...dead giveaway.

If you don't pay your exorcist....you can get repossessed.

With her marriage she got a new name....and a dress.

You are stuck with your debt if...you can't budge it.

Local area network in Australia...The LAN down under.

tjs
Next - Sequestration (Mon.)

Potpourri X

Lunacy! - Datelined Washington D.C. via Associated Press - "The word "lunatic" will be stricken from Federal law under legislation that passed the House on December 5th. - The latest effort to remove language that is considered either outdated or demeaning." So Congress really was working last week. (There was one "no" vote.)

I just read where bedbugs are appearing in library books. Apparently some people still read in bed and then return books to the library for further "circulation".........That should keep me out of the reading room for quite a while.

A study out of Turkey indicates that poor oral hygiene can lead to Erectile Dysfunction. This should increase the sale of toothpaste and dental floss.

Bill Gates had a conversation with Steve Jobs in heaven. Gates asked "How are things up there?"
Jobs replied - "It's great  - there are no gates nor windows!"
tjs
Next - TBA

Hallowed Evening

I lost another friend this year. Eddie C. was 81,  lived in central New Jersey and died on October 31st at the height of the SANDY perfect storm.  All power was out but those great folks at Hospice had him well supplied with medication, etc.  - and he was at home.  Then the gasoline shortage prevented many from getting to his wake.  The aftermath prevented the funeral director from obtaining a burial permit so with further delay threatening, the family had him cremated - not how Eddie planned his exit. In the realm of trick or treat it seemed my friend was treated to a mean trick of fate. I can only imagine how many families in NJ/NY may have confronted a similar situation with an untimely death in the family. R.I.P.
tjs
PS - For Seniors - Further downer is the SSA rule that stipulates benefits are not payable for the month of death. By dying on the last day of October that means  the check received in November  must be returned. Bummer!
PPS - Today 12-12-12 - this type combination of numbers will NEVER occur again.
Next - TBA