Holy Week

Today is Good Friday when the Christian world commemorates - not celebrates - Christ's crucifixion. Last Tuesday our Jewish brethren celebrated their feast of Passover. Yesterday was Holy Thursday when Pope Francis visited a youth detention center in Rome and washed the feet of inmates. And Easter Sunday marks the anniversary of Christ's Resurrection which is the holiest day in the Christian calendar. Expect the churches to be packed - if only on this one day. And on our domestic scene, Cardinal Dolan of New York visited a correctional facility in upstate New York on Wednesday where he celebrated Mass for the inmates. Here is his quote "I love to say Mass in a prison. Nobody ever comes late and nobody ever leaves early." The Mass included a "wine free" communion. In our family home in Cape May, N.J. there is a sign on the refrigerator that reads "Just be nice......." May you and yours have a Happy Easter being nice to each other.
tjs
Next - TBA (Mon.)

Winter Games

You may be familiar with the saying "carrying coals to Newcastle" - a town in the U.K. that produces coal. Now we read about "manufacturing snow in Russia" where snow is usually in plentiful supply. The 2014 Winter Olympic Games are scheduled for February 2014 in the Black Sea area where February temperatures can rise to 50 Fah. - not good for snow production. The organizers recall the 2010 games in Vancouver, B.C. which also experienced a shortage and required helicopters to drop snow in the bare areas. The Russian experiment is aimed at producing and stockpiling 500,000 cubic meters of snow and stored under insulated blankets to get thru next summer. The Olympic area consists of varied elevations and it is the lower levels that are of most concern. (Complete article in NYTimes 3/26/13)

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/26/sports/olympics/with-weather-concerns-organ
tjs
Next -Holy Week

BIG U Revisited

The S.S. UNITED STATES Conservancy has announced it is running out of funds to save this majestic vessel from the scrap yard according to the Associated Press and YAHOO press releases. They comment on some of the celebrities and prominent passengers who traveled on her to and from Europe. This great ship was Queen of the Seas from 1952 to 1969 - seventeen casualty free years - under four different Masters. There are many stories surrounding her active lifetime. On one eastbound voyage from New York to Europe the passenger list included both Liz Taylor and Debbie Reynolds - and for five days at sea they never ran into each other - thanks to the talented Chief Steward and Chief Purser and their staffs. Of course, many such celebrities took their meals in their cabins for privacy.  Permit me to add a few such anecdotes in the days ahead as the Conservancy struggles to keep the memory of this ship alive.
tjs
Next -Winter Games

The Bluebird - UPDATED

In August 2011, in order to extend my outreach in social media, my son suggested that I sign up with a group who has a bluebird for logo. But I learned that they only allow 140 characters per message and it takes me that long just to clear my throat. Anyway, I applied and they issued me what they called a "hashtag" as an I.D. and I dispatched my first and only phrase "What hath God wrought?" Nothing like being original! But the I.D. read"tjsmith27" insinuating that there were twenty-six other "TJs" roaming the blogosphere.  This was a jarring realization and spoke to a cloning operation. By and by, Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI began using this system but apparently he was not concerned for the previous XV Benedicts "lying" around out there. Anyway, after "breaking my maiden" in August 2011 my bird has been silent. In 1934 Cole Porter wrote the lyrics for the Broadway show "Anything Goes." One song that never made it up the charts was "Be Like the Bluebird" (you might catch it on YouTube).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGFz7q6AEpY

 I have the CD of Cole himself singing this in his squeaky voice at the piano. The last line goes "Tweet, tweet - tra-la, tra-la, tra-la."
tjs
Next - The BIG U Revisited

Deja Vu Etc.

I just read where several retailers were fined for using real fur to appear as fake. This is just the opposite what they did fifty years ago when the retailers then used "faux" material to appear as real fur.  A strange turnabout, indeed.

Also noted that Mayor Bloomberg of New York City is advocating keeping cigarettes under the counters of stores and not in the open. This is exactly what we did during WWII when I worked in a drug store (pharmacy). When we received delivery of a few precious cartons of Chesterfields or Camels they were immediately "sequestered" under the counter and saved for the pharmacist's special clients (read Doctors).  So if you ever saw that ad "More doctors prefer Camels than any other cigarette" you might infer that that poll was taken during WWII.
tjs
Next - The Bluebird

Cape May

Cape May at the southern tip of New Jersey was spared the brunt of storm Sandy and except for some sand in the street we luckily dodged the bullet. I went down there for St. Patrick's Day weekend and an Irish folklore group was performing - one banjo - two fiddles - a squeeze box and a piper also playing the tin whistle. I can only stand bagpipe music in small doses but this guy was reaching out to every dog within earshot. Ah, but we also had step dancers - with their arms by their sides - the way my friends used to do up in Washington Heights, in upper Manhattan - in the Irish neighborhoods. Of course the Guinness was flowing to calm the nerves after which we put away our CDs  and shillelaghs until next year but still thinking "green" to respect the environment, honor the shamrock and regret the greenbacks I spent listening to a bagpipe solo.
tjs
Next - Deja Vu, Etc.

Spring Has Sprung

Yesterday, March 20th, we celebrated the Spring Equinox or the first day of Spring. But you couldn't prove it in the Mid-Atlantic region. I am beginning to lose confidence in the groundhog's predictions. No sign yet of the first crocus or daffodil or of the birds returning north. While waiting we can be absorbed in the excitement of March Madness for the next three weeks. I will not reveal my selection favorite so as not to upset the oddsmakers in Las Vegas. So let the games begin!
tjs
Next - Cape May

Irish Potatoes

Harking back to my childhood I can remember the confectionery Irish potatoes made of coconut and covered with cinnamon - and here they were back on the counter this year. The subject of potatoes reminds me of the time - early 1950s - when we put the S.S. AMERICAN JURIST into Searsport, Maine to lift a cargo of sacked potatoes to Germany. It was a time when we were still putting Europe back on its feet. The stevedores had to stack the potatoes in the ship's hold and they rigged up a slide with a counter to slide the sacks down into the hold to avoid rigging up nets, etc. The counter recorded the number of sacks so we had a good count. Upon discharge in Bremen we were five bags short - the Germans were very precise. Then a crew member remembered that while loading in Searsport several longshoremen - during a break - had sport by sliding down the chute thereby being counted as a sack of potatoes. No wonder we had a shortage on outturn! (This story is excerpted from The Eagle Blue Chronicles - published 2010)
PS - You will note I did not learn spelling from Dan Quayle.
tjs
Next -Cape May

Human Resources

After 550 postings please excuse if I repeat myself. At my previous employer, Human Resources (H.R.), was run by a sensitive and competent woman who had a penchant for role playing. Each year we had a session on "sexual harassment in the workplace" - mandatory attendance -  and each year she selected me to act the role of harasser - I began to get a complex but finally figured it was because of that Lt. Colombo raincoat I wore that she thought I would make a good "perp". One evening, after a maritime function, she and her colleagues gathered at a local watering hole that had a billiard table in the rear. Someone challenged her to a game of eight ball. She chalked her cue and proceeded to clean the table. Growing up we would have attributed her proficiency to a "misspent youth." I told my friends that if you ever challenged her to a game of billiards - "You've got trouble, my friend, with a capital T and that rhymes with P -and that stands for POOL."
tjs
Next  -Perhaps Wed. after a long St. Patty's Day weekend.

When in Rome

Tomorrow we mark the Ides of March - the day Julius Caesar should have called in sick and not gone to the senate. But today all roads lead to Rome - we have a new Pope Francis - he is a Jesuit and he is a non-European. There is a Latin phrase spoken during his coronation "Sic transit gloria mundi" which translates to "Thus passes the glory of the world." But some years ago I saw the following translation on graffiti on a New York subway wall "Gloria Mundi is sic of transit" - probably written by a frustrated commuter waiting for that local that never comes.
tjs
Next -Human Resources

Heads, You Lose!

The following is not for the squeamish. David Kirkpatrick writes in the N.Y. Times 3/11/13 date line Cairo, Egypt "After centuries of public beheadings , the kingdom of Saudi Arabia is considering firing squads as an alternative means of execution."........"because of the scarcity of swordsmen and their unavailability in a number of regions." "The few officially authorized swordsmen were so busy traveling between different regions to conduct executions that they sometimes arrived late - "which causes security confusion"!!!  The "kingdom" has beheaded more than 75 in each of the past two years saying they are adhering to the precepts of their Holy Book - literally!  When will those folks come into the twenty-first century? Even the French did away with the guillotine.
tjs
Next -Human Resources
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/11/world/middleeast/saudis-consider-firing-squads-for-executions.html

Potpourri XV

"I never saw a purple cow - I never hope to see one  - but I can tell you, anyhow - I'd rather see than be one" so wrote Gelett Burgess. But now I have read of "the purple squirrel" - a term coined in the world of Human Resources which refers to an impossibly qualified job applicant - i.e. one who doesn't exist.  It is appalling that some employers bring back applicants six and seven times and never fill the job. Out of work since 2011 R. Ahlfield says "They're chasing after that purple squirrel"

Lou Carnesecca, former coach of St. John's (New York) basketball team, when giving a pep talk to his team might say "A genius without discipline is like an octopus on skates" - perhaps they scratched their heads leaving the locker room after that one.

"May you have warm words on a cold evening, a full moon on a dark night, and the road downhill all the way to your door." (Irish Blessing found on a cereal carton) Enjoy St. Patrick's Day weekend.
tjs
Next - TBA

Smoke Rise

Right now 115 Cardinals of the Roman Catholic Church have gathered in Rome to elect a new Pope. It takes two-thirds votes plus one to be elected via secret ballot so that the winner needs 77 votes to ascend to Peter's chair. After each voting the ballots are burned and if insufficient votes you will see black smoke emitted from the chimney of the conclave room. When a successor is finally elected you will see white smoke coming out of the chimney accompanied by much cheering from the throngs. With this many diverse members it will be curious to see how many ballots it will take. In 1939 with WWII imminent Pius XII was elected on the third ballot but there were only half as many Cardinals then as today. Benedict XVI was elected on the fourth ballot. They do want a decision before Palm Sunday which starts Holy Week. One hopes they don't take too long which might require a chimney sweep to empty the furnace of all the ashes. Stay tuned and watch the rooftops.
tjs
Next - TBA

Daylight Saving Time

This weekend we spring forward again - it seems to get earlier each year - with most of the year on daylight time. Dark mornings with children on the corner waiting for the school bus. The deer crossing the road thinks it is 6:00AM but the speeding commuter thinks it is 7:00AM - so watch out, Bambi! Are we really saving energy? Clocks to be changed - Nuke - stove oven - coffee pot - four clock radios - wall clock - wrist watch - auto dashboard - voice mail and the sun dial in the garden is all confused. I understand that Russia has nine time zones. Think what it would do if one zone forgets to switch over - airplanes would be arriving before they depart. Some years ago I arrived at the Philadelphia Airport early on a Sunday morning about this time of year  to find that the only flight that day had already departed due to a timetable snafu i.e. "Daylight Saving Time". The PANAM rep was closing shop and not happy to see me. He offered to rebook me out of New York later that day. When I asked how would I get to New York he suggested the Pennsylvania Railroad! I almost flipped! We "negotiated" and he found a shuttle up to JFK and I was on my way. As you can see I am a biased witness as to DST. I wonder what Andy Rooney would say?
tjs
Next - TBA (Mon.)

Twenty Somethings

We all know what 36-26-36 signifys - an hourglass figure. But what is meant by 22-22-22 which is what was requested by a media manager in Manhattan recently? Apparently his need was for a twenty-two year old to work twenty-two hours a day for $22,000 per year. Surely peon's wages and brutal hours but a fact of life in creative circles today. Intersperse such job conditions with a few unpaid internships and that is what drives many young people back to living with mom and dad. Read more on NYTimes Sunday Styles 3/3/13 "The No-Limits job"
tjs
Next - Daylight Saving Time
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/03/fashion/for-20-somethings-ambition-at-a-cost.html?ref=style

Valet Parking

All of us at one time or another have used valet parking and found that our preset radio dials have been changed and perhaps a bit of sweat stains on the seat. But help is on the way. Automatic parking systems are springing up in wealthy communities. For a healthy fee you may be able to drive your Rolls Royce or Hummer onto a platform and let an elevator raise your vehicle and park it on your condo level adjacent to your apartment. The system is capable of parking these autos only two inches apart which no valet could do. The few hiccups with such system might be failing to fold in side mirrors which causes the elevator to "think" your Bentley is too wide or perhaps dropping a chunk of slush on the platform which interferes with sensors. If you can tolerate these minor interruptions this system might be for you. It certainly eliminates your requirement to sign autographs in the garage. For the rest of us plebeians we will have to continue to reset the radio dial.
tjs
Next - Twenty Somethings
http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2013/02/28/realestate/30302013_Deal_Parking.html#1

If Pigs Could Fly

A pig farmer in Iowa recently crossed some Chinese origin pigs with a Russian wild boar producing meat sweet and dark receiving rave notices from culinary circles in San Francisco. The pigs produced from this imaginative mating bear the following characteristics: 'They are floppy-eared with black fur, broad jowls, a thick rump, creased foreheads and long bodies and snouts." Sounds like someone I used to know. The only downside seems to be the meat is too fatty for the prosciutto market. Pork marketers always praised as the "alternative white meat" - they now have to make room for this new hybrid.
tjs
Next - Valet Parking

Red Shoes

Flash - The Pope wears Prada! Those red slippers he wore are supposed to represent the blood of martyrs. Now that Benedict XVI is retired he will return to normal shoes. In 1943 I was an eighth grade altar boy at Holy Child School. The parish had planned an event in church that would include a procession up the middle aisle. The nuns selected me to lead this procession and I would be wearing a white cassock and red slippers. So it was that after school one day I - wearing my corduroy jacket - found myself being escorted by two nuns - they in their black habits - on the subway train to Gimbels department store to purchase a pair of red slippers. The event went off as planned and I never saw those red slippers again. They may be under glass at a museum along with Dorothy's red shoes.
So what do the Pope, Dorothy and I have in common? RED SHOES.
tjs
Next -If Pigs Could Fly

Flower Show

Each Spring brings with it the Philadelphia Flower Show which is a "Big Deal" and takes over The Pennsylvania Convention Center. The theme for 2013 is the English Garden.
When the Trumans were in the White House, Bess had a visit from a Ladies Club and Harry was proud to show off his roses to the group. He said his red roses were so healthy because of the cow manure he heaped on them. And the yellow roses were blooming in profusion due to the extra sheep manure. On leaving one lady whispered to Bess "I wish you could stop Harry from saying that word "manure"." Bess replied - 'You don't know how long it took me to get him to SAY manure."
The byproduct Harry was using used to be carried dry in the holds of ships. But if water entered the hatches and the "byproduct" got wet it produced methane gas and when a crewman went down with a lantern there would be an explosion. The shipowners got wise and henceforth instructed the stevedores to "Stow High In Transit" to avoid wetting and so they stamped the bales with the abbreviation of the leading letters which led to the word we use today in the vernacular. If you are still holding your nose I will leave you with a bit of trivia. The late Bill Veeck who owned baseball teams and a  race track was fascinated by the latter and wrote a book titled "Thirty Tons" which was the amount of stable output accumulated in one day at the Suffolk Downs Race Track.
 This was before we invented the word "logistics". As we sailors used to say "Stay upwind."
tjs
Next - TBA (Mon.)